If you’ve never heard the phrase people come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime, this is one of those ideas that really sticks. It’s been around for years, but it still hits deep every time we talk about it.
Tamekia wasn’t sure where she first heard the phrase, but after a little digging, we found the original poem by Brian A. “Drew” Chalker. No matter where you hear it, those few words – reason, season, or lifetime -are powerful and have shaped how we think about relationships in every part of our lives: family, friends, business, and even within our marriage.
“When you figure out which it is, you know exactly what to do.”
That line alone says so much. We’ve both had people come and go. Some walked with us through a tough moment, others showed up with encouragement or joy right when we needed it, and then there are those rare few who have stood the test of time.
Not Everyone Is Meant to Come With You
As we’ve grown, especially over the last few years, we’ve learned something really important: not everyone is meant to come with you. And that’s okay.
Sometimes the people around you aren’t growing in the same direction. It doesn’t mean they’re bad or you’re better. It just means your paths are different now. And trying to force certain connections to keep going can leave you feeling stuck, drained, or just disconnected.
Tamekia said it in our latest podcast episode:
“I’m learning not to feel bad for choosing peace. That doesn’t mean I don’t care. It means I care enough to protect my space.”
Boundaries Help You Grow, Not Shut People Out
It’s a tough lesson, especially when it comes to family or long-time friends. But we’ve had to get more mindful about who we spend time with, who we let speak into our lives, and who’s actually encouraging us to grow.
We’re not just talking about the bad vibes either. Sometimes it’s just people who feel like they’re coasting while you’re pushing. And you’re left wondering why it feels so hard to connect. That’s usually a sign something’s shifted.
Tamekia shared this:
“You can’t let somebody else’s energy keep you from stepping into what you’re called to do.”
Find People Who Feed Your Purpose
We’ve learned the value of surrounding ourselves with people who inspire us, who challenge us in a good way, and who aren’t afraid to say, “You’re off today. What’s going on?”
From friends who push us in business, to people who encourage us spiritually, to a 21-year-old who is ready to “meet me at the track,” we’re realizing it’s less about age or titles and more about energy and intent.
The key is figuring out who’s there for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. That doesn’t mean cutting everybody off. It means adjusting expectations, setting boundaries, and giving yourself permission to grow without guilt.
Listen to the Full Conversation
We talk more about this in our newest podcast episode. It was one of those real talks that just flowed. If you’re navigating shifting relationships or learning to protect your peace, this one’s for you.
🎧 Listen now:
Reason, Season, or Lifetime? Learning Who’s Really in Your Corner
And a big thank you to Brian A. “Drew” Chalker for writing the original poem that inspired this conversation. If you haven’t read it, look it up. It’s a powerful reminder that not every relationship is meant to last forever but they all have meaning.
Wrapping It Up
We’re still learning how to navigate this, but one thing we know for sure: people come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. Knowing the difference helps you protect your peace, grow in the right direction, and make space for the relationships that really matter.
If you’re working through change or letting go of what didn’t turn out how you hoped, check out this post on turning failure into fuel. It’s one of our most honest reflections on disappointment, growth, and keeping your faith through it all.